Please tell me what’s on your mind..

My step brother called me earlier asking if I was at home because he wanted to come and pick up a photograph, I thought that he was alone until I opened the door and he was with a girl. I was amazed, this was the first time that he has introduced to one of his friends that’s a girl. She says that he isn’t her boyfriend, it’s complicated between them but I’m not going to get into much detail since it’s personal. It has been two hours and they’re still here comfortable on my couch, I find it real cute. I’ve never seen him so happy and she seems really nice. I guess this is actually meant to be once you’ve fallen hard.. I’m quite jealous, I want to find that special someone just like he has.. I want to be able to feel what he is feeling at the moment, I want to find someone that captivates me. 

I’m always the one to blame, I can’t help it if I don’t know all the answers to your questions. What did I do to deserve this torture? No matter how many tears I shed, you will never see how weak I am becoming.. My eyes are so sore and I’m extremely tired. How long is this going to last? Because I don’t think that I can take it any longer.. 

I don’t exactly have reasons for what needed to be done, or maybe I do.. It’s just hard to explain. But this is who I turned out to be.. Only so that I can save myself from the misery. Not wanting to suffer and trying to stop the pain that comes with it.. What I desire is probably something that I will never admit to anyone. The truth should be told, as people say.. It’s bad to keep things ‘bottled up’. I still take that into consideration, but some things aren’t worth sharing with others. I believe that it is better this way..

It’s like you ain’t even here anymore.